To Have Someone
by cajunhusker
Summary: Blaise Zabini always had confidence in himself, and he never really questioned it. But he notices something in Draco and comes up with words for them both. (Can be read as a prequel to Something New. Aro and Ace Story)


Blaise Zabini had always known he was a little bit different when it came to relationships. He never seemed to get past the kissing stage with anyone, and had never had an interest in going further.

It wasn't something that ever seemed to bother him much. He just had no interest in sex, and never planned on having any interest in it. Why should he? He didn't have to have sex to show that he cared about someone, and if someone cared about him, they would understand that. Otherwise, he would leave them behind him without a thought.

He had before, and it had left him with a couple of odd looks when he told a girl he wasn't interested in anything. Some had pushed, others had tried to coerce. All ended up crying when he said he wouldn't put up with it and they were through.

Zabini's didn't need anyone else, after all.

That was something his mother had taught him from a young age. He didn't need to rely on others to be happy or confident. That was something inside of him, and it was something he should always remember. He did remember it. It didn't mean he didn't have friends, but he never relied on them in the ways others seemed to.

It was when another relationship had ended in his sixth year that he was reading in the library after sending the girl away when she tried to get a little too handsy for his tastes that he came across a word that he hadn't heard before. Asexual… He sat there for a moment as he read over the description, taking in the meaning of the word. Not experiencing sexual attraction.

The fact that there was nothing about any activity otherwise made him think for a moment before he shrugged and let that fact slide. The term fit him perfectly. A term for his lack of sexuality. So that meant there was others like him, which he found interesting without actually pursuing the thought.

And he accepted the word and moved on.

There was no shock of finding out what he was, and not much of a passing glance except that he now included the word asexual in his description of himself. A word that proved just how much he relied on himself compared to others. And he likes it that way. He still likes the romantic bits once in a while, but things never get further than that just because it isn't something he will do.

His life continued on like it had before without much change. He'd found a word that described him like 'smart' or 'attractive'. That was all.

It wasn't something he really thought about again until Draco started dating Parkinson in fifth year. As much as she got on his nerves, he thought her and Draco might have a chance until the other boy started to moan about every little thing she did.

She wanted dates and cuddling, flowers and moonlit walks. Things that Draco absolutely hated, but Blaise sometimes enjoyed himself. It was baffling that he would stay in a relationship when he hated all the things that his partner expected of him, but he supposed that Draco preferred to please people rather than just dump them. It still made very little sense to him though.

Blaise didn't need anyone, why did Draco?

He never really questioned it though until they were both sitting near the fire in their common room as he listened to the blond start to bemoan his girlfriend's antics yet again.

It was nice, and warm at this point, and many of the other students had gone to bed already. Crabbe and Goyle had been sent away, and Parkinson was nowhere to be seen. So Blaise finally decided to broach the subject of just why Draco would stay with someone that he hated.

"If you are going to constantly complain about her, why are you in a relationship with her?" Blaise asked, raising an eyebrow just slightly as he kept the judgement out of his voice. Draco would only get heated if he thought he was being judged.

Which left the blond to sit there and contemplate the idea for a moment, stunned. "I mean… Why wouldn't I? The sex is good, and she is usually up for that even if she's a pain in the arse," he said. "And Father expects me to be in a relationship with someone."

Blaise rolled his eyes in response. "Yes, but just because he might want you to be in relationship doesn't mean you should be. That doesn't seem to be the wisest when you don't seem to have any romantic attraction towards her," he said as he picked up his mug of hot tea.

"Of course I'm attracted to her. She's bloody gorgeous," Draco retorted with a snort, shaking his head slightly.

Which only left Blaise to sigh in annoyance as he misunderstood what he had been trying to say. "Romantic attraction, Draco. I'm not talking about physical attraction or sexual attraction. I'm talking about the attraction that means wanting to 'snuggle' or go on dates and enjoy more than just the physical aspect of your relationship," he said. And he could see Draco's nose wrinkling as he listed off the things. "You know, the butterflies in your stomach feeling that everyone talks about?"

"Not really. Never experienced it. I thought people were making it up, to be quite honest," he grumbled, shifting his weight in his seat awkwardly. Draco couldn't really cope with the fact that people actually felt that way and he didn't. Would that make him weird? Wrong? Broken? He couldn't deal with those facts. Especially not in the Malfoy family. Malfoy's were perfect.

Blaise pause as Draco explained how he had felt about sexual attraction. Though, for him, it obviously hadn't been as upsetting. Draco, on the other hand, seemed to not be taking this in stride. Did no one else get raised to trust themselves before others first?

"And if that's how people are, is there something wrong with me?" Draco asked softly, frowning as he tried to put the pieces together.

And that was when a word clicked inside Blaise's mind. Something that he had thought about when he came across the word that had applied perfectly to Draco. He'd let it slip by beforehand without much though, but not might be a better time. "If there is something wrong with you, it is your bright blond hair, not that you are aromantic," he commented simply, shaking his head.

Draco frowned in confusion as he listened to him. "There's nothing wrong with my hair," he retorted. "But what is aromantic? I've never heard that term before…" And the look of pure confusion was just slightly amusing to Blaise even if he didn't comment on it.

"It means you're not attracted to anyone romantically. It's kind of like I'm asexual. I don't have an interest in sex, and you don't seem to have an interest romance. It's not hard to figure out. There's others out there too, you know," he commented as he settled back in his seat comfortably. "There wouldn't be a word if there wasn't others."

And that was when he got the stunned silence that left Draco standing there gaping. Well, sitting there. But still. He was utterly confused, and of course Blaise would be the one to come up with the answer to his unasked question. "Wait, asexual. You're… So that's why you never stay with someone long," he said quietly as things clicked. People wanted things to get more serious and Blaise probably wasn't up for that like he wasn't up for romance. "So you're saying I'm aromantic? Can you tell me more about it?"

Blaise snorted and shook his head slightly. "Go look it up. You're capable of reading," he said with a smirk. "And it'll make more sense to you if you read it yourself. If you take it all from me, I might be getting something wrong. So drink your tea and figure things out and let me know if I can help."

Draco laughed and shook his head. "Merlin are you an arse," he said and picked up his tea, taking a sip as his mind raced. He couldn't believe that there was a word for that…

And their conversation trailed off into lighter things for a while. Blaise hadn't mean to come out, but Draco was pretty accepting about it. Then again, they had always gotten along well.

Within the week of their conversation, Draco had broken up with Pansy. He'd accepted the term of aromantic, though he didn't really come out to anyone except Blaise, who had introduced the term to him. And they laughed by the fire again a few nights later over cups of tea as the common room emptied out again for the night.

And they were playing exploding snap and enjoy the time that came from having friends. The two might have opposite expectations in relationship, but they worked wonderfully platonically. They had a friendship that grew around a little bit of 'otherness' that they both had inside them. It was something they bonded over like they had bonded over the identity of Slytherin and history. What was different now is that had something in common that was completely different. What was most interesting of all was what it made Blaise realize.

Zabini's didn't anyone, but sometimes, it was nice to have someone.

* * *

(So, this is kinda a prequel to Something New. Not really, but kind. Hope you enjoy!)


End file.
